


Dying Flame

by ChristineThalassinou1990



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Jedi Apprentice Series - Jude Watson & Dave Wolverton
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bullying, Caring Dooku, Crying, Dad Dooku, Fluff, Gen, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Jedi Master Dooku, Jedi Robes Are Perfect Blankets, Master & Padawan Relationship(s), Meddling Dooku, Mental Health Issues, Obi-Wan Kenobi Needs a Hug, Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon has a foul mouth, Qui-Gon is a mess, Qui-Gon needs a hug, Sick Jedi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-19
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-10-31 06:33:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17844245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChristineThalassinou1990/pseuds/ChristineThalassinou1990
Summary: After years of endless ordeals called missions, Qui-Gon starts showing symptoms of a serious burn-out. He's a mess, and to help him, Dooku comes up with the idea that Qui-Gon should take a Padawan of his own. The only problem is that Qui doesn't want a Padawan.Can a certain, unbearably cute Initiate make him change his mind?





	1. Chapter 1

"Padawan..." Dooku sighed, not for the first time this evening. "You won't solve anything by drinking up all of my Alderaan whisky."

"Right now I don't want to 'solve' a sith-damned thing. I just want to forget everything for five bloody minutes!" Qui-Gon growled, dropping on the couch in his former master's quarters and sending down the shot of drink in one go.

"Well, you've definitely forgotten that your people practically can't get drunk due to your very high alcohol tolerance. You'll be just sick, with a perfectly clear mind so you'll just suffer even more." Dooku sighed again, sitting down next to his ex-Padawan. "Please tell me what's wrong. You know I just want to help."

Dooku only knew that Qui-Gon yet again had a clash with the Council when he got home today morning and apparently refused to go on another mission. Dooku met him late afternoon in the garden and immediately saw that his former Padawan was a mess. So he invited Qui-Gon for a drink, but the younger Jedi was well on the way to thoroughly abuse this offer.

For long minutes, there was a comfortable silence between them, but then Qui-Gon took a deep breath and tried to put his misery into words.

"In the last few years I've done nothing else than going from mission to mission, mostly to places where at least half of the population wanted me dead just for being there. I don't even remember when was the last time I've been here for longer than three days in a row. I know that as a Jedi, it's supposed to be my fucking job, but... It's so damn tiring to deal with stupid or outright hostile people all the time, without a break _for years_. I just... can't take it any longer..." he confessed, blinking rapidly as he suddenly felt like breaking down in any minute.

Perhaps he couldn't get drunk, but the alcohol still made many things easier for him, crying included; not that he needed much help with it. Dooku said many times that he was a bit too emotional for a male and especially for a Jedi, but Qui-Gon couldn't help it, and his former master learned to accept him just like he was.

"It's okay... There's nothing wrong with feeling exhausted sometimes" Dooku comforted him, pulling him into a warm hug as he'd lost the battle with the tears and began crying into his former master's shoulder. "That's why you refused to go on a mission again?"

Qui-Gon nodded, hiding deeper in the safe embrace; he needed this contact desperately. He needed the safety of his home and his loved ones, and the thought to leave again was simply unbearable. He was ready to fight anyone for his right to stay, even Yoda or Mace Windu, or the whole sith-damned Council, but fortunately, a harsh 'nope' with a few vague excuses were enough for them to leave him alone. It was strange, he was used to more fighting, but he was so tired in every possible way that he didn't really care. The only thing that mattered that he was here, and he didn't have to leave again for a long while.

Dooku waited for him to stop crying, and when he did so, he made him stand up and supported him into the apartment's smaller bedroom. There, Qui-Gon curled up on his old bed, shivering badly and hugging one of the pillows.

"I think I'm gonna be sick..." he sniffled, wiping his teary face with trembling hands.

Dooku let out an exasperated sigh but managed to restrain himself from uttering that 'I told you so'. He just took off his big, warm robe and tucked Qui-Gon in carefully, then found a bucket and placed it next to the bed.

"I'll be in the other room. Use our bond if you need me" he said quietly, stroking Qui-Gon's messy, silky hair gently. "Try to sleep, fluffball."

Qui-Gon half laughed, half sobbed at his childhood nickname; Dooku didn't seem like an endearing type, but sometimes he could come up with interesting names. 'Fluffball' was the very first thing he had said in a half-asleep state to Qui-Gon when his ten-year-old, brand new Padawan woke him up the first morning. The name stuck, and now it felt good to hear it again.

Dooku sent a gentle Force-suggestion through their bond to help him fall asleep, and soon Qui-Gon indeed slipped into an exhausted dream.

⃰

Next morning Qui-Gon woke with a throbbing headache and a nausea so strong he threw up everything he'd eaten in the last two days. He couldn't be thankful enough for the bucket next to his bed.

Not a moment later, Dooku sat down next to him, keeping his long hair off his face and stroking his back comfortingly during the ordeal. Qui-Gon sent a grateful wave through their bond, and Dooku sent back soothing ones, trying to ease his discomfort.

Soon Qui-Gon lay in his bed again, pulling his master's robe tight around himself and blinking sleepily at Dooku, who got back to him after he dealt with the mess.

"Are you feeling better?" he asked, giving Qui-Gon an Aspirin and a big cup of water.

"A bit..."

A few minutes of silence, then Dooku spoke up, somewhat insecure. Now, that was strange.

"Qui-Gon, have you ever thought about... taking a Padawan?"

The younger Jedi just stared, utter disbelief written on his face.

"You're not serious, are you?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first meeting of Qui and Obi

“Well, am I look like a funny person to you?” Dooku asked back, arching a bushy eyebrow.

“Um, not exactly, but you do have a sense of humour.”

“Good to know” the older Jedi muttered. “But to answer your question, yes, I was serious. It would be good for you to have a Padawan of your own.”

Qui-Gon couldn't help his incredulous laugh as he stared at the ceiling, still feeling baffled by the idea.

“And pray tell me... What, exactly, makes you think that? As far as I can recall the last evening, I wasn't the ideal Jedi, let alone master, in the slightest. I'm better off without a Padawan, and a Padawan is better off without me.”

Dooku sometimes just wanted to shake his former Padawan hard for being so stubborn and blind.

“Qui-Gon, you're... troubled right now, and I honestly think you need help...”

“So you think I'm crazy?” Qui-Gon interrupted, casting a painful glance at Dooku.

“No, silly, but you _are_ a mess. You're burning out, that's the name of what's happening to you. Given the circumstances, it's expected to happen, there's nothing wrong with it, and you're not crazy because of it” Dooku explained, letting his former Padawan snuggle into his arms as he talked. “But you can't deal with it alone either. None of us is strong enough to go through it alone.”

“But... but... I can't expect a child to play mind-healer with me” Qui-Gon muttered, suddenly on the verge of tears again, however, he couldn't tell why. “That's not a Padawan's task.”

“No, it is not. But you wouldn't believe how much a Padawan could help if you're close enough to each other. _You_ helped me countless of times just with your presence in my life. I would've been much, much worse off without you, Fluffball.”

That did it; and Dooku spent the next fifteen minutes with comforting his sobbing former Padawan.

⃰

A few days later, when he got himself together enough to move back into his own quarters, Qui-Gon was on his way to it after spending the whole afternoon in the Archives. He didn't work on a research or anything, but he did appreciate the calm, silent environment in his current state of mind. So he'd found a corner for himself and hid there with his e-book-reader, curled up in the chair and pulling his robe tight around himself.

However, he could hardly concentrate on his book; his thoughts wandered back to Dooku's idea again and again. Before all of this shit happened, he'd thought about taking a Padawan sometimes, but now he felt absolutely unfitting for the task. As Dooku put it, he was a mess, and he didn't want to burden a child with it. When he'd be better... _then_ , he'd think about it again.

As he turned on the corner of the next corridor, out of nothing, someone small collided with him at full speed, and a bony elbow smashed into his stomach with surprising strength.

“Bloody hell, kid...!” he gasped as he leaned against the wall and caught the stumbling Initiate’s arm to prevent him from falling. “Are you blind or what?”

The kid, a boy around ten or eleven, with short, messy reddish-brownish hair, looked up at him with utter terror on his face.

“I-I-I’m so-sorry, master...” he stammered, and he seemed suspiciously close to tears. “I didn’t me-mean to...”

As the kid blinked up at him with those big, teary gray-blue eyes, Qui-Gon started to feel like a complete asshole. He sighed and ruffled the kid’s hair, much to the Initiate’s surprise. He went very still, as if he couldn’t decide yet if he could trust this adult or not and played safe instead.

“Don’t worry, kid, I won’t hurt you. I won’t even punish you. Just be more careful next time, okay?” he said and hoped that he managed to smile reassuring rather than threatening.

“Yes, master! Thank you, master!” the boy exclaimed, bowing clumsily; but Qui-Gon found it cute.

“You’re welcome, but master is Yoda’s ten thousand years old wrinkled green grandmother, not me. I’m Qui-Gon Jinn. And you’re...?”

“Obi-Wan Kenobi, mas... sir” the boy answered, already calmer; he even smiled at Qui-Gon’s comment on being a master. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“You, too, Obi... May I call you Obi?” the Jedi smiled back; for some reason, he felt at ease with this kid.

The boy nodded, eyeing Qui-Gon curiously.

“What is it?”

“You feel... sad” Obi said, struggling for a better word but not finding it.

“I’m fine” Qui-Gon denied by pure reflex, but Obi didn’t seem convinced. “I have to go. Take care, kid.”

He didn’t exactly know what made him flee, but the feel of Obi’s radiating empathy and genuine care made him want to cry, and he had no intention at all to break down before any Initiate. He felt Obi’s surprise by his sudden departure, but he was sure the kid would find a way to deal with it. He’d think of him as the strange, borderline crazy Jedi he met on a peaceful afternoon, if nothing else.


	3. Chapter 3

Dooku found him curled up in his bed and still crying when he dropped by an hour later to check on him. In the last few days Qui-Gon had been crying an awful lot, but it was still much better than bottling up his emotions and trying to run away from his pain, as Dooku feared he would.

“I wasn’t aware it’s rainy season” he muttered fondly as he sat down on the bed and reached out to ruffle Qui-Gon’s already messy hair some more.

“Very funny...” came the muffled answer, but at least Qui-Gon slowly stopped crying and even seemed a bit calmer and balanced. “Thanks for coming...”

“Anytime, Fluffball. I’ve even got some of your favourite cookies.”

That finally made Qui-Gon smile, although, it was a small, pretty sad smile; Dooku felt his heart breaking a bit.

“What happened that made you open the floodgates?” he asked and gave Qui-Gon the cookies when his former Padawan sat up and snuggled into his arms.

Qui-Gon just shrugged; he couldn’t really explain it. The meeting with that Initiate upset him in a way he didn’t understand, but strange enough, it wasn’t fear or apprehension he felt but a soul-deep sense of loss and loneliness.

“I... ran into someone” he finally said, nibbling on his cookies. “Or more like he ran into me... quite literally.”

“Oh. Who was he?”

“A kid, I’ve never met him before” Qui-Gon shrugged again then looked up at his former master. “Nope. Don’t even think about it” he growled, noticing the calculating glint in Dooku’s eyes. “I’ve already told you that no way in sith-hell I’d take a Padawan!”

“If you say so, Padawan” Dooku nodded, but the quiet, smug smirk was still on his face when he left an hour later.

⃰

Two weeks later Qui-Gon found himself in a spacious classroom with about a dozen ten- and eleven-year-olds; Obi-Wan Kenobi included. Ever since Dooku tricked him into telling him the whole story of meeting with the kid, his former master had been meddling. Very subtly, but Qui-Gon was sure he was doing it nonetheless.

“Hey, kids, I’m the poor, unfortunate soul that master Dooku asked to be your substitute lightsaber-instructor while he’s on a mission. My name is Qui-Gon Jinn, and if any of you dare call me “master”, I’m gonna make sure you’ll have worm-soup for dinner. Any questions?”

The kids giggled, not one of them afraid of him, and to be honest, it was a nice change. Perhaps it was just the fact that they were in a rather large group now, but when Qui-Gon met lonely kids, they were always scared of him.

“Then how should we call you?” a girl asked, looking up at him with wide green eyes.

“However you want, frankly... Qui-Gon is just fine, but if you don’t remember it at the moment, then ‘Hey, you there!’ should do as well” the Jedi shrugged.

The group giggled again, not quite sure what to think about Qui-Gon. Very few of them even knew him, and Obi was the only one who had talked to him more than a greeting. They were used to master Dooku, who was kind but very strict and demanding, always pushing them to their bests. Qui-Gon, on the other hand, looked like he’d scarcely even held a lightsaber and would be better off in a greenhouse or something like that.

And he felt strange in the Force. Obi was sure everyone in the group noticed it to a certain extent, but for him, Qui-Gon felt like a tightly wound, shivering ball of hurt, pain and emotional exhaustion, radiating waves of sadness and misery. The kid had no idea what could happen to this Jedi that made him like this, but he would’ve really liked to help to make it better.

First, however, he had worked hard during the lesson, not wanting to give Qui-Gon a reason to think he was a bad Initiate; but when he approached the Jedi after the lesson, Qui-Gon just smiled at him as a farewell and left the classroom before anyone could’ve talk to him.

Obi had a guess he’s escaping, and that made Qui-Gon all the more inexplicable; but Obi-Wan Kenobi wasn’t the easily giving up type.


	4. Chapter 4

“When will you get back?” Qui-Gon asked, and he didn’t care at all that he sounded like a lost little Initiate missing his favourite master.

He did feel lost, and he did miss his former master. Dooku made sure to call him every evening while he’d been away on his mission, and this small ritual felt anchoring and comforting in a way.

“Things are just getting more and more complicated here... Neither of the fractions are too willing to reach an agreement, and I fear that civil war is about to break out” Dooku said, voice tired and strained. “So I don’t know, but I’ll try everything to go home as soon as possible.”

Qui-Gon almost let himself say out loud his first, instinctive response: that if there was a war pending, then Dooku should get the hell out of there. Even the thought of his former master being in danger was heartbreaking in his current state, but he knew all too well that Dooku would flat-out refuse the idea of escaping just because the situation was hard.

“Be very careful... please!” he finally said, trying his best to hide the shake in his voice, but he couldn’t fool Dooku. His former master knew perfectly well how worried he was right now.

“I will” Dooku promised solemnly. “But how are your lightsaber-classes going? I hope the kids are not too tiring.”

“No, they’re in fact pretty cute... and they miss you as well. For some inexplicable reason, they want their grumpy old shark of a master back.”

“Watch your language, Padawan” Dooku growled in feigned indignity, but then he couldn’t help the laugh. “I miss you, too. All of you.”

After a few more comforting sentences, Dooku bid farewell and ended the call, and Qui-Gon curled up in his bed, pulling Dooku’s robe tight around himself. His master left one of his big, warm robes here, knowing that Qui-Gon liked using it as a safety blanket. It comforted his Padawan ever since the beginning of his apprenticeship.

Now Qui-Gon hid deep beneath the warm fabric, breathing in the familiar scent and slowly falling asleep.

⃰

About a week later Qui-Gon was hiding in the Archives, in the company of his favourite book and a cup of hot tea, trying desperately to keep his mind focused on anything but his former master. Dooku still called him every day, but the news he shared with him made Qui-Gon half-mad with worry. The planet Dooku was on was just a breath away from a devastating civil war, and it seemed that the Jedi wouldn’t be able to prevent it, however hard he tried.

He promised Qui-Gon that he’d leave if the situation turned into outright impossible, but the younger Jedi just knew his former master way too well. Dooku tended to fight to the last possible moment, often putting himself in unnecessary danger.

The sudden noise of nearing footsteps jerked Qui-Gon out of his dark thoughts, and when he looked up from his cup, he saw Obi-Wan Kenobi walking toward him, with a small package in his hands. Qui-Gon wasn’t really in the mood for talking to anyone, but since he didn’t want to be an asshole either, he didn’t say a thing to scare the kid away.

Soon Obi got to him and offered the small package to him with a shy, painfully cute smile.

“Thanks...” Qui-Gon muttered, opening the box carefully. A few of his favourite cookie were in the box, and the Jedi felt actually touched by the kind gesture. He even managed to smile back at the kid. “You want some?” he asked, offering the cookies to Obi, who took one after a minute of hesitation.

“Thank you” he said, his voice still somehow uncertain.

He still couldn’t really place Qui-Gon, he wasn’t like any of the Jedi he’d ever met, sometimes Obi wasn’t even sure that the man was really a Jedi. But it didn’t matter at all if Qui-Gon was a Jedi or not, he was a human being in pain, and Obi was determined to help him somehow.

In the last week he could make him stay after the lightsaber-class sometimes, and they talked about small, unimportant things like Obi’s homework and things like that. The kid knew that Qui-Gon liked him, he felt it when they were together, but the adult Jedi wasn’t willing at all to open up. He never answered any question concerning his well-being or emotional state, or he just muttered that he was fine. It was an outright lie, and Obi knew it, still, that was all he got.

“Why?” Qui-Gon asked suddenly, raising the box of cookies a bit to make it clear what he was talking about.

Obi shrugged with an innocent smile.

“I thought you’d like it... I heard that a small kindness could help someone a lot who’s sad.”

Qui-Gon looked away; damn this kid’s perceptiveness. He knew he couldn’t fool Obi, and to be honest, he was getting pretty tired of trying it anyway. With Dooku away and possibly in danger, he couldn’t share his worries and fears with anyone, and Obi’s empathy just felt too good.

“You really are an amazing kid, you know?” he sighed, ruffling Obi’s hair with unhidden affection.

Obi blushed lovely, and Qui-Gon couldn’t help his smile seeing this reaction.

“Why are you so scared?” Obi risked the question; he felt the Jedi’s radiating fear and worry clearly.

Qui-Gon just shrugged first, but then he couldn’t keep it inside anymore.

“I’m afraid for my master...” he finally admitted, his voice cracking a bit. “I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to him...”

Obi didn’t know what to say to make Qui-Gon feel better, so he just stepped to him and hugged him tight, trying to be supportive. To his surprise, Qui-Gon didn’t refuse the physical contact, moreover, it seemed he needed it desperately, for he hugged Obi back and clung to him for dear life; but he did refuse to break down.

He did that later that day, when Dooku finally got back in the middle of the night, his ship landing gracefully on the Temple’s own spaceport. The Jedi master couldn’t even fully get off the landing ramp when Qui-Gon arrived running and threw himself into Dooku’s arms, clinging to him and weeping into his neck.

Dooku didn’t try to calm him, he just held Qui-Gon close and let him cry.

“I’m here, Fluffball. I’m here” he murmured, running his fingers through Qui-Gon’s silky hair slowly.

His former Padawan soon calmed down, and they got back into Dooku’s quarters.

“I missed you very much...” Qui-Gon muttered sleepily as Dooku tucked him in carefully.

“And I missed you, too. Now try to sleep” Dooku answered and supported it with a gentle Force-suggestion.

A moment later Qui-Gon was fast asleep, and Dooku couldn’t shake off the feeling that despite of the breakdown not long ago, Qui-Gon felt calmer and more balanced. He was really curious what happened while he had been away on that sith-damned mission.


	5. Chapter 5

Next morning Qui-Gon woke to the scent of his favourite hot chocolate with a hint of vanilla in it. At first he just curled up, pulling Dooku’s robe over his head, not quite willing to give up his warm, comfortable half-asleep state. He just whimpered something incomprehensible, but his former master was persistent in his quest to lure him out of the bed. In the end, Dooku won.

“Thanks” Qui-Gon muttered, sipping the sweet drink slowly, enjoying it as long as he could.

“You’re welcome” Dooku smiled at him. “Tell me, what did I miss? Anything interesting happened while I’d been away? How were you with the kids?”

“It was okay, they were cute... mostly. One of them thought me an easy target and actually tried to bully me... It was in fact pretty funny” Qui-Gon shrugged.

“Let me guess... Bruck Chun” Dooku sighed; he himself had no such problem with the kid, but he’d heard about the Initiate’s other ‘deeds’ quite a lot.

Bruck was a born bully, full of self-confidence issues and fears and always ready to make others suffer because of that. Dooku considered notifying the Council and suggest the boy being removed from the Order, but he hadn’t done it yet. Perhaps this was the right time to change this.

“Yes, we’re talking about him” Qui-Gon nodded, looking into his cup, lost in his thoughts. “I know that it’s absolutely not okay what he does to the other kids, and I’ve tried to make him understand it, but... I can’t help feeling sorry for him a bit. There’s something wrong with that kid, and we should try to help him instead of just throwing him out like garbage.”

Dooku sighed, his heart aching a bit for his innocent, incredibly empathic, kind and gentle ex-Padawan. Even in the midst of his own misery, Qui-Gon could think about others as well. The Order needed more Jedi like him, but unfortunately, everyone but the Order saw that.

“You were always too kind for your own good, Qui...” the older Jedi said, stroking Qui-Gon’s back fondly.

“Well, that’s me” Qui-Gon shrugged again, this time smiling at Dooku; and this smile was a bit more genuine than before.

⃰

Two weeks later, as Qui-Gon was on his way back to his quarters in the evening after spending the whole day with his former master, he suddenly heard some noise from a nearby classroom. It was pretty strange, for there were no classes after 4 p.m. and the classrooms should’ve been empty. The Jedi decided to investigate a bit.

He opened the door as silently as he could and sneaked inside. At first, he didn’t see a thing so he activated his lightsaber; these things were pretty fine flashlights when not used for chopping the enemy to pieces.

In the farthest corner he spotted a small, curled up form; obviously a child. A quietly weeping child, as Qui-Gon heard upon walking closer to him.

“Obi...? Is that you?” he asked, having the feeling that the child was somewhat familiar.

The kid looked up, startled, and Qui-Gon saw that he was indeed Obi-Wan Kenobi. His eyes were red and teary, his face puffy and wet with tears; Qui-Gon felt his heart squeezing painfully.

“What’s wrong, little one?” he asked, sitting down beside the kid.

Obi just shrugged, and this one small movement spoke volumes of despair and hopelessness.

“C’mon... you can tell me” Qui-Gon encouraged him, ruffling his messy hair gently. “I’m gonna help if I can, I promise.”

Obi took a shaky breath, then it seemed he decided to trust Qui-Gon; they’ve come to be on really good terms, after all.

“Bruck... I’m his favourite target lately” the kid admitted, wiping his face with the sleeve of his tunic. “He always calls me clumsy and... and other things... I’m not clumsy!”

“Of course you aren’t” Qui-Gon nodded solemnly, and he meant it; when he’d been their substitute lightsaber-instructor, he saw that Obi was one of the best in his group.

“Then why does he say it?” Obi asked, his voice small and a bit teary.

“I can’t answer to that, I’m not Bruck after all. But... perhaps Bruck is afraid or lonely or something like that, and he tries to hide it with this bullying. Perhaps he needs help as well” Qui-Gon said, letting Obi snuggle into his arms as he talked.

“You mean... he’s like you? Because you’ve always said that you’re fine and you weren’t fine” the kid muttered, and Qui-Gon could barely restrain himself from flinching.

Opening up, especially to an Initiate, was still hard but in the last few weeks he’d finally learned that it was completely useless to lie to Obi. The kid just knew. So slowly, Qui-Gon sometimes talked a bit about himself and what happened to him in the last few years that turned him into the mess he was now.

“Yeah, maybe he’s a bit like me” he finally admitted with a sigh.

“Do you think that Bruck would accept if I wanted to help him?” Obi asked, looking up at Qui-Gon.

“Well, it’s definitely worth a try” Qui-Gon smiled back, feeling warm pride toward this amazing kid in his arms.


	6. Chapter 6

Two months later Qui-Gon was chilling in the Archives, as he used to do on his bad days, with his e-book reader and a big, hot cup of his favourite tea. There were still days when he just wanted to hide and pretend he didn’t even exist. As time passed, the number of these days declined, but even when he felt alright it wasn’t zero.

However, when he was on his way outside, a scene he spotted made him stop and look better. He saw Obi-Wan, which wasn’t too surprising in itself, for the kid was a diligent student who always had his homework done in time, but the other kid with him was Bruck, and they didn’t even try to kill each other. Now, that was interesting.

Qui-Gon decided to investigate a bit about what was going on; he was in fact pretty curious. So he walked to the desk the boys were sitting at, working on their homework in companionable silence.

“Hey, kids” the Jedi smiled at them, and Obi instantly jumped up, throwing himself into his arms as a greeting.

Physical contact had become a norm between them in the last month or so, so Qui-Gon just hugged the kid back, ruffling his hair as if nothing were more natural. Bruck, on the other hand, was much more cautious. He didn’t even return the smile just waved with his hand shyly.

“Hello, master Jinn” he said, being more polite than he’d ever been with Qui-Gon.

Well, that was new.

“Qui-Gon hates when we call him ‘master’. Don’t you remember?” Obi spoke up, looking at his companion, but this look was open and friendly.

“It’s okay, no harm done” Qui-Gon said quickly when he saw Bruck blushing in shame. “I’m indeed not a big fan of that title, and to be honest, I’m not even a master, either. So just call me Qui-Gon, please” he smiled at Bruck, and this time the kid smiled back a little. “Anyway, what are the two of you doing? Plotting something interesting?”

“Nope, we’re just doing homework” Obi answered, still clinging to Qui-Gon, and the Jedi let it. “Bruck said he has a problem with the essay for our literature class, and I offered to help.”

“Well, Bruck, you’ve hit the jackpot” Qui-Gon said to the kid. “Obi-Wan is the best help you can get.”

Bruck just nodded as an agreement, and Qui-Gon caught the impressions of some of his feelings through the Force. The kid was confused, for he hurt Obi-Wan for many times, still, the other boy was willing to help him when he had a problem. The Jedi felt this confusion, mixed with some regret and fear; he had a guess Bruck was afraid he’d lose this peace and friendly stance with Obi-Wan.

“Okay, kids, good luck with your essays. See you later, Obi” the Jedi said, ruffling the boy’s hair again as a farewell, then left the Archives.

Obi watched as his friend disappeared, but Bruck’s comment jerked him back to reality.

“You should be his Padawan” the other boy said, and Obi just stared at him in stunned disbelief. “Actually, you two are acting like it. He’s always kind and friendly with you; he even helps with your homework” Bruck added, shrugging. “I think he’d ask you to be his Padawan soon. It’s just a matter of time.”

“Well... That’d be good” Obi smiled, hope blossoming in his heart that soon he’d be the Padawan of the Jedi who became one of the most important people in his life.

The only problem was that said Jedi still didn’t want even to hear about taking a Padawan of his own.

⃰

“Do you know what happened to that problematic Initiate?” Dooku asked one evening about a week later, when Qui-Gon was cuddling a cup of tea, curled up on his couch in the common room of his quarters.

“You mean Bruck? I’ve heard that he’s changing for the better” Qui-Gon answered, smiling quietly into his cup.

“And all of this thanks to your little friend, Obi-Wan Kenobi” Dooku nodded, open admiration in his deep voice. “He’s indeed a remarkable boy.”

“Yeah, I know. But what about Bruck? Why did you bring him up?”

“Well, in fact he’d changed so much, both in his manners and in his attitude toward his education that I’m considering taking him as my new Padawan. If he keeps doing so well, I will ask him in a few months” Dooku replied, contentment coming off him in waves through the Force.

Qui-Gon knew very well how much his former master liked teaching, and he hadn’t had a Padawan for long years by now. His last one was knighted almost a decade ago.

“I think you’d be the perfect master for him” Qui-Gon smiled at Dooku, being happy for the other’s joy.

“It’s kind of you to say that” Dooku smiled back, sitting down next to his former Padawan. “But what about you? Obi-Wan is a really cute kid, and you two love each other, you’d be a good team together. Take him!”

Qui-Gon swallowed, looking into his cup; he couldn’t keep up the eye contact with Dooku. Yes, he loved Obi with all of his heart, and he wanted the best for the kid; that’s why he wouldn’t take him as a Padawan. He didn’t want to make the boy’s life miserable with his own problems. Obi deserved a master much better and more prepared than him. He deserved a master who wasn’t a chaotic, emotional disaster mess.

The thought of Obi being with someone else hurt much more than he’d care to admit, but he was ready to let it happen if it meant Obi would have the best master he could get.

“I can’t. He deserves better than me” the younger Jedi whispered, and he just wanted to cry.

Dooku let out an exasperated sigh but didn’t say anything, not wanting to make Qui-Gon feel even worse; he just hugged his former Padawan, letting him cry himself to sleep in his arms.

Obi-Wan was eleven, he still had two years before aging out. Dooku just had to make sure Qui-Gon would be ready by then; and that no one else picked Obi as Padawan. For some reason, Dooku was sure that Qui-Gon and Obi belonged to each other, and he was ready to do anything to get them together somehow.


	7. Chapter 7

A few months later Bruck Chun indeed became Dooku’s new Padawan. When he burst into Obi’s room and told him the whole story between happy jumping and enthusiastic yells, Obi went along, sharing his friend’s joy, but when he lay awake in the middle of the night, he couldn’t help but wondered why Qui-Gon didn’t do the same. Even Bruck guessed it was just a matter of time until he’d ask Obi to be his Padawan, still, it just didn’t happen.

Obi knew Qui-Gon loved him, it wasn’t a question even for a second, so the kid assumed that the problem was with his Jedi friend somehow; however much he hoped that in the almost half a year since they’ve known each other Qui-Gon’s near-depression and insecurity issues were getting better. Although, it seemed he was still pretty much just recovering.

However, when even Obi’s twelfth birthday passed without Qui-Gon asking him to be his Padawan, the kid got increasingly worried, and not just because he knew very well that he was on the road of aging out pretty soon.

“Do you think I should just ask him to take me?” he inquired one afternoon, when they were in Bruck’s room and working on their homework.

Since Bruck became master Dooku’s Padawan he lived in his mentor’s quarters, in the smaller bedroom, and Obi was always a welcome guest here. The Jedi master was nothing else than kind and friendly with him, and Obi got the feeling that even master Dooku wanted him to be Qui-Gon Jinn’s Padawan.

“If nothing else works...” Bruck shrugged. “Everyone thinks that you should be his Padawan, so I don’t really get what’s his problem.”

“Well, master Dooku said something about him being not ready or something like this...” Obi muttered, playing with his pen absentmindedly.

“And what does that mean exactly?”

Obi just shrugged as an answer, not really wanting to tell anything about the few stories Qui-Gon shared with him as an explanation of why he was a useless mess right now. He was careful to speak about these things to Obi on his level, leaving out the too gory or scary parts, but the kid understood nonetheless, perhaps better than any freaking mind-healer would. Qui-Gon’s disgust of the mind-healers was legendary in the Temple.

In the next moment they heard master Dooku arriving home, and Obi took his leave, in case Dooku planned anything for his Padawan. However, after leaving the Dooku-residence, Obi didn’t go back to his own room but headed toward Qui-Gon’s, determined to settle this Padawan-question once and for all.

⃰

Qui-Gon woke to the warning from the Force that someone just walked into his quarters, but when he recognized the familiar presence, he just fell back into the bed, burying his head into the pillow.

“Qui-Gon?” he heard a moment later.

“Bedroom” he groaned, lifting his head up a bit.

Obi showed up in a second, and the kid snuggled beside him without the slightest of hesitation.

“Are you ill?” he asked, worry written on his cute face; Qui-Gon couldn’t help the smile wanting to spread on his face by this sight.

“Don’t know, I might have caught something on the public transport yesterday...” he shrugged, still sleepily. “I feel a bit dizzy...”

“Oh... can I ask you something anyway?”

“Yeah, I’m not dying” Qui-Gon murmured, hugging Obi protectively.

The kid snuggled into his arms and hid his face into Qui-Gon’s shoulder, and the Jedi felt his hesitation clearly.

“What’s wrong, little one? I won’t bite your head off, I promise.”

Obi swallowed but finally gathered enough courage to ask:

“Will you ever choose me as your Padawan?”

Qui-Gon went ominously still, but interesting enough, he held Obi even closer, seemingly by pure reflex. The kid didn’t dare say anything, he just waited for the answer with his heart pounding in his throat.

After a few minutes that felt like an eternity, the Jedi cleared his throat.

“I want to be completely honest with you, so I must admit... I wasn’t going to” he whispered, feeling like a complete asshole when he sensed Obi’s utter disappointment and pain. “Not because you’ve done anything wrong or I don’t think you’d make a good Padawan...”

“Then why?” Obi interrupted, and however hard he tried to hide it, Qui-Gon knew he was close to tears, which only made his feel of guilt worse.

“Because you deserve the best master you can get, and I don’t feel like a master at all, let alone the best” he explained, trying to choke back his own tears.

“But you _are_ the best!” Obi claimed passionately. “The best _for me_ , and I don’t want anyone else but you!”

“I’m not so sure about that but... but the thought of you being someone else’s Padawan hurts” the Jedi confessed, not being able to hide any of his feelings anymore.

“Well, no one else was interested in me so far...”

Qui-Gon’s heart squeezed; he knew that this meant that Obi would be sent away soon, and perhaps they’d never see each other again. It was much more painful than he’d care to admit; he grew to love this kid like his own child. Although he was still scared to death by the thought of him being someone’s master, and he was full of insecurities, but if that was the price of Obi remaining a part of his life, then he was willing to pay it.

“Then I’m interested. Perhaps I won’t be the perfect master, and you’ll have to deal with my stupid problems, but I promise I’ll do everything to protect you” he said, and he was surprised how much he meant it.

“That sounds okay” Obi grinned, giving Qui-Gon a bear-hug so tight that the Jedi was sure one of his ribs quietly cracked under the pressure.


	8. Chapter 8

As it turned out, Qui-Gon indeed caught something nasty, so the next day he stayed in bed, nauseous and slightly feverish, and master Dooku handled the administration needed to make Obi’s apprenticeship official. The kid was over the moon with excitement, so Qui-Gon sent him to celebrate with his friends.

“Don’t worry about me, I’m gonna be alright” he assured his new, worried little Padawan. “Eat an ice cream for me, okay?” the Jedi smiled, however, even the thought of any kind of food made him sick right now.

“But...” Obi protested, torn between his need to celebrate and his sense of duty toward his beloved master.

“Everything’s gonna be fine. Go, little one!”

Obi finally left after a last worried glance, and Qui-Gon fell back into his bed, curling up and burying his head into the pillow as he fought a wave of nausea. He really didn’t have any idea what he could catch on that sith-damned public transport. Soon, however, he felt that he’d lose this battle so he stumbled into the bathroom, just in time.

That was the exact moment Dooku chose to step into the apartment, and Qui-Gon, for an understandable reason, couldn’t care less about it right now.

“You should see a healer” he heard behind him a second later as Dooku crouched down next to him, keeping his long hair off his face. “You look like shit.”

“Don’t you say...” Qui-Gon whimpered, trying to catch his breath.

“Where’s your Padawan?” Dooku asked as he supported his own former one to his bed, still quite stunned by the fact that he could even articulate this question now.

“I sent him to his friends to celebrate his big day... He should enjoy himself now, not nursing me...” the younger Jedi groaned, sipping slowly the cup of water Dooku got him.

Dooku let out an exasperated sigh but said nothing. He just touched Qui-Gon’s face, closed his eyes and reached for his healing powers. His former Padawan was a stubborn one who bore a hatred so strong toward healers that Dooku deemed it better to use his own, somewhat limited powers in most cases; at least Qui-Gon trusted him completely.

His former apprentice sighed, relieved, as Dooku’s healing powers flew through him, easing the nausea and the fever considerably.

“Here. You’ll be completely fine by morning” Dooku said, stroking Qui-Gon’s hair gently.

“Thank you” Qui-Gon smiled back, hugging his former master gratefully. “I feel much better.”

“Good. But... why did you change your mind about having a Padawan?” Dooku asked, barely able to hide his curiosity.

Qui-Gon just shrugged.

“Mostly because I’m selfish, I guess” he admitted quietly. “I love Obi, and I don’t want him to be someone else’s Padawan, or no one’s, for that matter. I just... want him to be a part of my life.”

“It would be selfish only if Obi didn’t feel the same way; but he does. He loves you very much, and his only dream was to become your Padawan. There’s nothing selfish in it” the older Jedi said. “You made him the happiest kid in the Temple.”

“That’s good to know” Qui-Gon smiled, but this smile was quite short-lived. “But... I’m still afraid... I don’t feel like a master at all, so... what if I screw up?” he asked, swallowing hard as fear crept on him slowly.

“Look, Fluffball, no one said being a master is easy; it isn’t. But I can promise you this: you’re not alone. I’ll always be there to help you, but you have to find your own way in this, for I can’t solve everything for you all the time. And I have faith in you: you’ll be a good master for Obi, I’m sure of it.”

“I hope so...” Qui-Gon whispered, quite surprised that his master was so talented in giving a motivational speech.

Dooku stayed with him for the rest of the day, in case he’d get worse again, but fortunately, Qui-Gon just slept through most of the afternoon, without any sign of relapsing.

In early evening, Obi got home, happy and enthusiastic, grinning all the way.

“Hi, master Dooku” he yelled, throwing himself into the Jedi’s arms.

“Hi, little one” Dooku smiled, hugging the kid back. “I hope you had a great day.”

Obi nodded then began telling everything as Dooku prepared dinner for him. He was in the middle of his story when Qui-Gon stumbled out of his bedroom, blinking sleepily at the pair of his Padawan and former master.

“What did I miss?” he asked as he sat next to Obi, ruffling the kid’s hair.

“Are you feeling better, master?” Obi asked back, still visibly worried.

“Yeah, but my name is still Qui-Gon. I don’t listen to ‘master’” he muttered, casting a drowsily indignant glance at his cheery Padawan.

Obi grinned and hugged Qui-Gon tight before he began his dinner.

“How do you feel, could you eat some soup or something like it?” Dooku inquired, looking at his sleepy former Padawan.

“I’d give it a try” Qui-Gon nodded, and he managed to eat the whole cup of warm soup Dooku placed before him.

“Alright, bedtime, both of you” Dooku ordered when he saw that both Qui-Gon and Obi were yawning relentlessly.

None of them objected, and soon Dooku left a peacefully sleeping pair of master and Padawan behind.


	9. Chapter 9

Qui-Gon woke to the feeling of someone small snuggling closer to him, and when he opened his eyes, he saw his little Padawan, Obi-Wan Kenobi. The kid was still asleep, curled up in his master’s arms, obviously feeling perfectly safe; and Qui-Gon was determined to make this feeling stronger in him.

He still felt something very close to cold dread when he thought about himself as someone so precious’ master, but at least he knew he wasn’t alone in this. His former master Dooku promised that he’d help as much as he can.

That was the exact moment when Obi woke up, hugging Qui-Gon tight as a morning greeting.

“Hi, little one” Qui-Gon smiled at him, returning the hug. “I think I have a few interesting things to teach you.”

“Like lightsaber fight?” Obi asked enthusiastically, jumping up and down on the bed a little.

“Hey, that’s my bed right here, brat!” Qui-Gon gasped, grabbing his Padawan and hugging him tight to his chest again.

Obi laughed happily as he snuggled into his master’s arms, and Qui-Gon just held him, stroking his hair gently.

“When am I going to have a Padawan-braid?” Obi asked a minute later; he’d become Qui-Gon’s apprentice two days ago, but he still didn’t have a proper haircut and braid, and he was eager to fix this small problem.

“As soon as we had some breakfast” Qui-Gon sighed, giving up his warm, comfortable place in his bed and getting up, with his little Padawan on his tail; Obi followed him everywhere like an enthusiastic puppy.

After they ate something and Qui-Gon had the minimal amount of tea he needed to function properly, he escorted Obi to the barber in the Temple, where his Padawan finally became such in his hairstyle as well. Qui-Gon had to ask the barber girl to help with the braid, simply because his hands proved to be too big for the task; Obi’s hair was short to begin with.

“Here. You look adorable” the girl grinned, and Qui-Gon had to agree.

Obi was small for his age and had such a cute face that no one could resist him; the kid wrapped even Dooku around his little finger with such ease that even Qui-Gon couldn’t achieve back then, when he was the man’s Padawan. He’d had to work hard at least for a week to make Dooku fell for him as much as he finally did. Obi made the master melt in a day or two.

“Thank you!” Obi said, hugging the girl as a sign of his gratitude.

A minute later they left the barber and Qui-Gon took his Padawan to the training rooms. Obi really enjoyed lightsaber fight, so the Jedi let the kid attack him as much as he liked. He didn’t attack back, for he didn’t want to hurt Obi accidentally, so he used this practice to get to know his Padawan’s skills when it came to attacks. Obi was really good for his age, he even managed to get dangerously close to hit Qui-Gon for a few times, for he was small and really quick.

Soon Dooku joined them.

“Will you two fight?” Obi asked, his excitement clear on his face.

“Oh, so the little Padawan demands us to entertain him?” Dooku arched an eyebrow and ruffled Obi’s hair affectionately.

“Of course not, master. My only desire is to learn from you. Everybody say that you’re the greatest duellist in the Order” Obi answered, smiling up at Dooku innocently.

“The little one surely does know how to make you love him” Qui-Gon muttered, but he was up to some real fight.

So Obi sat down at the side wall of the room, and Dooku and Qui-Gon jumped at each other’s throat; or, more exactly, Qui-Gon jumped, Dooku only waited for him to land then kicked his ass four times in a row. That was the moment Qui-Gon deemed it wiser to surrender.

“It’s okay, Fluffball” Dooku comforted him as they were on their way to the Temple’s cantina to eat something. “You still have plenty of time to figure out how you could win.”

“You’ve never won?” Obi chirped up when they sat down at an empty table with an amount of food that would’ve been enough for a small army.

“Not against my own master...” Qui-Gon sighed, devouring his soup and almost purring in satisfaction.

“I will win against you! Someday” Obi swore, looking at Dooku straight in the eyes; the determined expression on his face was so cute Dooku wanted to melt right on the spot.

“I’m sure you will” he nodded, fighting with a smile.

Despite being sith-damn tired after the sparring session with Qui-Gon and his every muscle aching, Dooku had never felt happier than in that exact moment. Obi and Qui-Gon finally got together, as it meant to happen, and he had a grand-Padawan to spoil; yes, everything was perfect.

**The End**


End file.
